If you are about to get married, maybe you are wondering about how to announce the wedding date (something more than the spamming via WhatsApp to friends and family the photo of the ring!).
So here’s a quick guide to find the best way to spread the good news.
You will discover:
- What tradition wants
- How to adapt tradition to today’s needs.
- The save the date.
- Participation and invitation in a single card.
- The choice of wedding invitation.
- When and how to give the invitation.
How to announce the wedding date according to Tradition
In Italy, tradition requires that the parents of the spouses officially announce the date and the place of the ceremony, sharing the joy of their sons, and inviting guests to attend the ceremony (whether in Church or in the Town Hall).
The invitation to the wedding reception, in these cases, is placed on a separate card.
This is because the two communications have different functions and not always the same recipients: the participations traditionally were given to friends, colleagues, neighbors, acquaintances (of both parents and spouses) to announce the happy event and let those who know the couple to attend the ceremony (that’s why Italian’s wedding are mostly crowded), while the invitations to the wedding reception were intended exclusively for people who actually were invited to the reception.
Tradition reflects the dynamics of the romantic relationships in the past: before marriage (in some contexts, the wedding was combined by families) there was an official engagement period in which the two families met each other and therefore it was normal for parents to announce the marriage of their children.
How to announce the Wedding date nowadays
Let me be clear, even today some spouses follow the tradition: if families have known each other for a lifetime, or if the social context is very traditional.
However, in some cases, to follow tradition it seems to be a stretch that does not reflect the reality in which the spouses live.
Nowadays, there are couples who live together before they get married, they often come from different cities and families met just on the occasion of the engagement.
Consequently, in these cases, it seems unreasonable that the parents announce the marriage of their fully grown-up “children”. Thus, the spouses themselves announce their marriage.
Families can be mentioned at the beginning in a more informal way, in order to emotionally involve them in the announcement. Otherwise, they might not even be mentioned (imagine a married couple already living with children).
In short, the participation of marriage while respecting certain canons of etiquette wants to adapt and reflect the reality in which the spouses live.
Even in this case, there may be a division between wedding participation and the invitation to the ceremony (or to the subsequent open bar for friends).
How to announce the wedding date and the “Save the date!”
Finally, films and TV series have introduced us to the British/American traditions.
The announcement of the wedding date, well before the wedding, can be communicated by some spouses with a “save the date” card.
This card can be useful if you intend to announce the date of the wedding a long time before the event (for example, if you get married in some places like Venice, you must put yourself on the waiting list), or if the place of the ceremony is not was still decided or did not have confirmation from the place of receipt. In these cases, the save the date card is a nice and modern way of spreading the good news.
Budget-conscious spouses can imagine spreading a digital “save the date”.
To see the customizable Petit Design models click here.
Participation and invitation together
To compensate for the consumption of paper (and printing costs as well), some couples decide that the wedding invitation already contains the invitation to the reception.
In this case, the invitation will be given only to those who are actually invited to the ceremony and the reception. To other people, friends, and acquaintances, the card may be delivered only with the date of the wedding. This is especially true in the case of the c.d. destination wedding, or weddings in places other than the city of residence of the spouses.
For example, the announcement of a wedding in Venice, or in Tuscany or in Capri it would not make sense to give work colleagues the wedding participation because there would not be any chance for them to attend the ceremony without going to the reception, the save the date card can be enough.
Therefore, everything depends on the concrete circumstances in which the future spouses and the context of reference are.
How to choose participations
Once you have chosen the perfect style and tone to announce the wedding date, you will have to choose the medium on which to incorporate the whole.
Despite technological progress, paper keeps its charm intact and the choice to print one’s wedding invitations or save the date is also a way to communicate what will be the tone of the wedding: will it be a traditional wedding? Romantic? Innovative? Modern and minimalist? Or a theme wedding?
If you don’t have clear ideas, browsing some invitation models can be a way to define what kind of communication (and therefore marriage) you like. Alternatively, a wise choice is to choose neutral tones and follow the classic structure of the invitation.
On the other hand, if your ideas about your wedding day are too clear, all that remains is to have fun in choosing the perfect invitation or asking for a personalized design!
If you are eco-friendly spouses you can choose recycled paper or opt for digital invitations, you can create images or videos to send with your smartphone.
Also, you can hire a professional photographer who will be happy to take some pictures of the spouses.
Some spouses have come to create a private Facebook event to invite the best friends to the wedding (remember, however, to find a solution to communicate the news to the guests who are not members of Facebook). This choice is not recommended by etiquette and it is usually preferred by second marriage weds.
In times of tight budgets, it can be a creative way to share details about the wedding, and the day of the event guests can post the pictures in the event page (or story). You can also organize a contest.
When should participations be delivered?
Finally, once you have selected the type of invitation, you should deliver it to your guests.
The etiquette requires that if the marriage does not require traveling, the participation must be delivered at least three months before the wedding.
If the marriage requires guests to travel, the participations will have to be delivered at least six months before the date, in order to give enough time to organize the travel.
Etiquette also requires that the names of guests are handwritten on the envelope and delivered personally.
If the guests live far away, the envelope must be completed as if it were to be delivered by hand. Then, you should put it into another envelope (better if padded with bubble wrap). You will be able to write the address of the recipient on that envelop. The reason is to avoid dirtying the participation envelope with stamps and postmarks.
Are you getting married? Have you already chosen which kind of wedding you like best? Write it in the comments.
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